bonds broken, and bonds formed...

               Typically, bonds broken and bonds formed is more of a chemistry term…well, I mean this sort of has to do with chemistry I guess. But not the periodic table sort of elements, but this type of chemistry has its own elements. Like the elements that make up good relationships, and that break up good relationships, and so on.

               One day after school, this little kid was talking some mad shit about my little sister. I am totally the type of sister that will annoy, prod, bug, torment, do and say whatever to my younger siblings…. But just because I do it, does not mean you or anyone else in this universe can. I will come after you, and I will find you. Back to the story, so he was talking and I was listening, and getting more and more heated by the millisecond. It was almost like a chemical reaction had exploded within me. I pushed that kid into a fence and started screaming at him, his face went from red with laughter 0to white with fear, I was holding him around his neck shoving him into the fenced without even realizing it. I can’t even remember what I was saying or doing, I know someone tried to pull me away, and I was like the Hulk, I wasn’t budging. 

               But that’s just me. I don’t mess around. If you mess with someone I have a “bond” with, for the safety of yourself and those sorry individuals who try to help you, I suggest you don’t even think about it. I have no problem standing up for those close to me, or what I believe in. It’s just not okay. Sure my siblings bug the crap out of me more often than not, but I would take a bullet for them any day, same with my dad and really my family. Granted I would only take a bullet for my siblings and Dad and Grandparents, I would stand up and fight for anyone else. We just have those bonds. Sometimes they are broken slightly, but I’d never fully sever those.

               Times have shown me that I need to stand up for who I am, and what I believe in and for those I love, because you have to be strong, and you won’t win everything, but people you love and care about will be there for you. The bond with my family (a select few of them) is stronger than words I can think of, and though that doesn’t hold true for all of them, they’re a part of me, and we’re bonded one way or another. 

Respect.....or not.

So everyone always says you have to earn someone else’s respect, and you should always treat others with respect.....conflicting? Sort of. I always found that those who just demanded respect are often the ones who don't deserve it. I had a teacher. Obviously. But this teacher was one that always preached to treat others how you would want to be treated and blah, blah, blah. However this was the most disrespectful, rude, kid-hating, angry, scary woman I had ever met.

One day, she's droning on and on about God knows what, and I'm a little tiny elementary student. I had to pee. Shit.
So, I waited until she was done talking and when she was handing out our work sheets, I asked if I could please go to the bathroom. I wasn't about to pee my pants, but I couldn't not think about it either.
She of course asked if it was an emergency, with which I responded "Um, I don't think so...” and she replied "Well then, you can wait."
Seriously? I was so angry! I know my face immediately turned red, and not only was that slightly humiliating, I really did have to go to the bathroom. And though it had only been a few minutes, the urge to go was rapidly growing. I asked again, and this time I responded it was an emergency. I was granted with a "Well, it wasn't a few minutes ago, so I think you can hold it."
I wanted to cry.
I held it until lunch time, and I got to go. But that night I went home and told my mom, and I thought I was red in class!
She wrote a letter to the school, and called the principal the next day. She just said that if any of her children attending the school ever had to use the restroom, they could.
I felt that my teacher not allowing me to go to the bathroom was total disrespect. If I have to go, I have to go, and it's not always okay to hold it, it can cause permanent kidney and bladder damage as well as cause infections and more serious problems down the road.
I can understand that teachers do need to make sure that their students aren't just going to the "bathroom" to skip out on class, but I think they also need to understand we're kids, Sometimes we have to go a lot, and sometimes we don't. Those situations made me realize that people also have to earn my respect and just because they're an authority figure at that moment, it doesn't automatically grant them the right to walk all over me and be disrespectful. 
I've learned a ton about respect from that situation and many to follow, but they all made me think about the other person, and what if I was in their shoes. How would I feel? Did I know the whole story? It made me a more caring, and understanding individual, and showed me how to give respect as well as how to make others earn it.

Fairness, or lack thereof.

Fairness, everyone wants it and hardly anyone gets it. Sure, in the case of our beings, we were the sperm that one, okay so 1 up in our favor....sort of. So we got to be the one that turned into the baby, all the while the rest of that life, we'd be turning into adults...anything but a baby. In kindergarten and elementary school, if one kid had candy everyone had candy...except when it was earned of course. This brings me to how fairness has changed me.
Working almost 2 years at a job, working my butt off to be the absolute best I can be and to prove myself capable and worthy. I get an opportunity to get the best shift, so of course I jump at it. I got it! But then, I sort of got it. I got moved to every other Sunday. Not every Sunday. Okay, no big deal, I still sort of got it. JUST KIDDING! The new girl who hasn't worked 1 day gets it. Fair? Not in the slightest. So I work my hardest for 2 years, so someone who has not can take it? Gee thanks. Don't expect any favors from me, unfair boss lady. This changed me from being so excited and loving my job to hating just thinking about it. I know the corporate world, or really just any paying job "world" right now is a dog-eat-dog world, but in this case how can that possibly be fair, I've earned it. I know not everything in life will be fair, but denying someone something they've worked so hard for, is wrong. My second job has a completely different vibe. What's fair is fair there and everyone is treated as human, not checker pieces you can move all over.
I appreciate the fact she demoted me back to my previous position, while moving and messing with nothing else. I'm glad she sees me as disposable, because in no time I will be gone. More of me kicking myself to that curb instead of her, but I will be someone else's working treasure instead. I hope.
If life was fair, everything would have equal parts and pieces and nothing would be challenging or competitive. This has made me much clearer on how much people do not care and how I never want to be. Has this world turned not only cold, but heart-less too?